Feeling lost

Keeping up appearances
Around those whom I hold dear
Afraid to hurt
Afraid to love
It's rejection that I fear

I shut down
Create an isolating shell
No-one in
I won't get out
Why am I torturing myself?

There's no-one else
It's only me
I'm the one who creates this hell
I cry, I scream
How can I break free?

I feel lost
And all alone
Who's my guide?
Where's my map?
How will I get home